Lasik and Me

Oh, LASIK surgery.  It was a little psychologically scarring for me.  I don’t think I’m a surgery kind of person (don’t tell me husband the post-babies boob job is off).  It’s been nine months now and I can probably tell you a little without my anxiety sneaking back in and keeping me awake at night.  Hopefully.

It was a hot and sweltering summer.  I figured, “Hey, let’s get some LASIK!  Everybody’s doing it!”  Actually, it seemed like good timing.  Had time, had money.  I thought I researched like the dickens and I am still confident I found a great doctor.

However, from now on, if I’m ever considering any type of body alteration I am doing a Google search for “blah blah blah regret.”  Granted, I know I’ll get the worst of the worst reviews but at least I’ll really know the worst of the worst.  It seems like every person and every site I visited only raved about their LASIK.  So, I felt like a pretty big schmuck and a little ungrateful that my family was willing to spend money on something that I really regretted doing.

At least, this is how I really and truly felt for the first 3-4 months post op.  Now, I’ve lived with it a bit and have the perspective only time can give, and while I’m not sure I would do it again, I am much more at peace with my surgery.

The strange thing about all this is, I think, I’ve had a pretty good surgery, recovery, and results.  The surgery went as planned and expected.  They did have to re-suction (ewwww) one of my eyes a couple of times which resulted in some lovely burst blood vessels in my eye, but that didn’t hurt and goes away.

My vision results are good and my only real lingering side-effect is that my eyes are a little dry.  Although, I’m not entirely convinced they weren’t before when I wore contacts since I really didn’t like being in rooms with ceiling fans then either.  It was something I wasn’t expecting to be there, though, so maybe I should have asked for a dry eye test or maybe I’m just a delicate flower.  In either case, it’s not so bad that I feel I need tear duct surgery.

The real issues that freaked my shiz out after the surgery was when someone made an off the cuff remark how the flap never heals.  I mean come the frak on!  How did I miss this!  Shouldn’t the doctor have maybe mentioned this little detail?!  I was seriously flipped out.  I had insomnia, anxiety, spastic bouts of crying.  It was a little ridiculous – but they are my frickin’ EYES.  It’s not like you get another set!

Anyhoo, eventually when my eyeballs didn’t fall out I relaxed a bit.  I still have the worry that I’ll get in a car accident and the airbag will rip my flaps off or a baby will ninja-poke me in the eye or when I get old and need cataract surgery that it will cause problems.

However, I’ve mostly worked out the logic of these issues.  I mean, if professional athletes get this surgery done and still go out and play contact sports, I’m probably okay.  I would also like to think a few moms out there have had LASIK and most still seem to have two good eyes attached to their heads.  And, I know they did mention the possibility of needing contacts again one day with the usual degradation of your eyes that happens with age, so it must be okay to touch your eyes to put the contacts in and take them out, a little, I hope.

I had the flap cut with a laser and after a year I’ve heard they have to recut to do touch-ups.  So, it must grow back a little, even if the eye won’t be as strong as an unflapped eye.  Though, I don’t think I can do the touch-up thing.  I may not be in full-blown regret and anxiety mode but I’m not doing it again.

All in all, it is nice to be able to see more than six inches past my nose.  Traveling is a bit easier and if I ever get stranded on a deserted island or there’s a zombie apocalypse I probably have more of a fighting chance (but I really should learn some basic first-aid and how to start a fire and maybe I should start carrying a knife with me everywhere I go a la Bear Grylls).  Dealing with a sick child in the middle of the night is easier when you can actually see and not have to stumble around blindly.  It did take a while for computer gazing and book reading, for hours on end, not to kill my eyes the next day, but staring at anything for a long time is bad for your vision anyway.

I can’t really recommend for or against LASIK, I guess it depends on your level of spaz.  Apparently, mine is a little higher than I like to let on…