Sometimes the fun of parenting is too much fun for the people you know. So, I have a story perfect for anonymity. You will thank me for not including pictures.
It was a good morning. One of the ones that makes you feel like you’ve almost got it together – laundry is going; the kids got a hot, cooked breakfast and are now nicely playing together in the playroom (amazingly, not up my butt, for once); even the crock-pot is out. Then you hear from afar, “….poop!”
“He pooped on the floor!”
Of course, he did. The joy of potty training is that the little man looks super cute in Big Boy undies, can hold it most of the time, but just won’t #2 on the throne -so, it had been two days. All that being so, the floor poop was not unexpected. It was, however, during the clean-up that I realized this job isn’t for everyone. Above and beyond the poop clean-up, a parent must also endure further insults:
- A two-year-old singing, “Clean-up! Clean-up!” over you while you scrub their poop off their brother’s floor and rug.
- Realizing you were in the middle of sautéing onions and garlic. They are probably scorched so you’ll either have to make your meal blackened or start over.
- Just when you think you’re done said two-year-old says, “More poop!” Yep, there it is right on the pillow he sat on to watch you clean-up his excrement.
- When you take a moment share this awesome parenting moment with the world the wee nugget toddles up saying, “Wet.” Of course, he is, because he managed to close the drain to the bathtub you left him in and it has overflowed and spilled on to the floor.
- Just when you think the saga is finally over and you feel as though you will be smelling poop all day you realize (happy, happy, joy, joy) the reason you are still smelling feces 30 minutes post-incident is just because it is on your shirt. Yup. Right there just out of sight, directly below your nose.
It may not be glamorous but it’s mine!